[Katsuki likely hasn't seen Izuku at all since he patched him up on the battlefield during the fighting. Much damage had been done both physically and emotionally, and because Izuku's sense of justice didn't extend only to the court...he'd gotten himself in hot water with the Emperor. Little enough that he was spared something more serious like jail time, but you know...still not. Great. His punishments were two fold: a cursed tattoo branded on his right hand that would show everyone of his traitorous actions, and the task to inform families of the dead that their loved ones had passed during the war.
Katsuki will come across Izuku in the market square. He's not actually trying to interact with anyone (he's already found out what happens when he makes the attempt), but even as he passes it's obvious people are noticing if they happen to look. Most just avert their eyes and give him a wide berth, but some others aren't discreet about their displeasure. Izuku stops to buy something to eat but is immediately turned away, being informed that his money will be good there once he's learned where his loyalties should lie.
With soldiers that catch him passing, it's even worse. At the moment he'd been heading back towards the castle, but before he can get out of town he's stopped by his shoulder being grabbed by a nearby guard standing with some of his mates, who pushes Izuku back so they can get a good look at him. They note the tattoo and express their disgust in no uncertain terms, doesn't he know how many people died during this war? How many people he probably let die while he was spending his time fraternizing with the enemy?
Tears burn in his eyes as he keeps his mouth shut. They shout after him as he turns to continue to walk away, immediately drawing looks from the rest of the square.]
[ Katsuki doesn't really look into Deku after the battle. He can still see him on the compasses, so Deku's still in Fellden and still alive. That's enough for Katsuki to know.
He does spot Deku in the commotion, though, trudging away and... ]
Why the fuck are you always crying whenever I find you??
[ He has some bags in his arms from shopping and an annoyed scowl on his face. ]
[Izuku almost startles when he hears Katsuki’s voice come to him across the way, tense from having been shouted at and scolded for so much of his time today. It’s tempting to just walk off, but he knows there’s a likely chance Katsuki will follow, demanding he not ignore him...
Izuku hesitates, refusing to wipe his eyes as he brings his right hand between his arms, folding them as he slows but continues to walk.]
It’s nothing, Kacchan.
[He knows he can’t keep it from him, and doesn’t intend to. But he’s not sure he wants to talk about it now, out in the open.]
[Ugh. He can't lie, Katsuki will just know...Izuku looks down at the ground as he continues to walk, wishing he'd thought to pull his hood over his head so people couldn't recognize his hair as he made his way back.]
[Izuku pretty much has no choice but to reach up and grab the bags before they drop into the snow, juggling them for a moment before he gets them in his arms in a way that he won't be at risk of fumbling them.
Okay, fine. He can do this, at least. He tucks the bags close to his chest, planning on staying quiet as he follows Katsuki back to the castle with his shopping.
He can't as easily hide that new tattoo like this, though. He's not sure what he was thinking before anyway...it can't be hidden, no matter where he tries to hold his hands.]
Then we have to help smarter! Fuck, Deku, of course you shouldn't not help people, but you can do that without rubbing it in the faces of the people we're already helping.
[Izuku flinches like he'd been struck, but he doesn't fire back. Especially because he knows Katsuki is right.]
I...I'm not trying to do that.
[He glances up briefly as the castle comes into view. At least they'll be able to get away from judgemental gazes soon, because Izuku can't take it anymore.]
I've already been visiting families, informing them of their loss. I know I messed up.
But I can't stand watching people suffer, either. We didn't start this war, but we caused...we tore apart so many innocent lives during those battles. How am I supposed to be okay with that?
[ God knows he doesn't like it any more than Deku. They're both so different, but their main goal has always been the same... ]
But right now we can do more fucking good on one side or the other than we can being thrown out of the whole circus. Or do you think we can somehow go it alone?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Event aftermath | Sometime after 1/24 when the punishments go out
Katsuki will come across Izuku in the market square. He's not actually trying to interact with anyone (he's already found out what happens when he makes the attempt), but even as he passes it's obvious people are noticing if they happen to look. Most just avert their eyes and give him a wide berth, but some others aren't discreet about their displeasure. Izuku stops to buy something to eat but is immediately turned away, being informed that his money will be good there once he's learned where his loyalties should lie.
With soldiers that catch him passing, it's even worse. At the moment he'd been heading back towards the castle, but before he can get out of town he's stopped by his shoulder being grabbed by a nearby guard standing with some of his mates, who pushes Izuku back so they can get a good look at him. They note the tattoo and express their disgust in no uncertain terms, doesn't he know how many people died during this war? How many people he probably let die while he was spending his time fraternizing with the enemy?
Tears burn in his eyes as he keeps his mouth shut. They shout after him as he turns to continue to walk away, immediately drawing looks from the rest of the square.]
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He does spot Deku in the commotion, though, trudging away and... ]
Why the fuck are you always crying whenever I find you??
[ He has some bags in his arms from shopping and an annoyed scowl on his face. ]
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Izuku hesitates, refusing to wipe his eyes as he brings his right hand between his arms, folding them as he slows but continues to walk.]
It’s nothing, Kacchan.
[He knows he can’t keep it from him, and doesn’t intend to. But he’s not sure he wants to talk about it now, out in the open.]
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leave him alone. Katsuki is a petty ass bitch.
He's scowling now as he falls into step with Deku, annoyed Izuku didn't immediately give him his full attention even though he didn't...want it.., ]
So now you're crying about nothing??
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I...I don't want to talk about it out here.
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Fine. Be useful then!
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[Izuku pretty much has no choice but to reach up and grab the bags before they drop into the snow, juggling them for a moment before he gets them in his arms in a way that he won't be at risk of fumbling them.
Okay, fine. He can do this, at least. He tucks the bags close to his chest, planning on staying quiet as he follows Katsuki back to the castle with his shopping.
He can't as easily hide that new tattoo like this, though. He's not sure what he was thinking before anyway...it can't be hidden, no matter where he tries to hold his hands.]
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You're lucky you weren't thrown out, too.
[ Like Korra. ]
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He wishes he had it in him to hold his tongue and not reply, but he feels like he has to defend himself, now. His teeth grit hard behind his lips.]
I didn't do what she did.
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[ Look ]
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There were innocent civilians who needed my help. I wasn't just going to stand there and watch them die.
[Ever so slightly avoiding answering that directly...]
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[ He's not stupid, Izuku. ]
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[He lowers his voice more, pulling his hood tighter over his head.]
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I didn't say that. But you sure as fuck could have done it smarter!
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[He mutters, bitterly. He still doesn’t feel like what he did was wrong, or that he should- or even COULD- have done it any differently.]
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Look, do you want to stay with the Court or not?!
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Yes, but...
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I...I'm not trying to do that.
[He glances up briefly as the castle comes into view. At least they'll be able to get away from judgemental gazes soon, because Izuku can't take it anymore.]
I've already been visiting families, informing them of their loss. I know I messed up.
But I can't stand watching people suffer, either. We didn't start this war, but we caused...we tore apart so many innocent lives during those battles. How am I supposed to be okay with that?
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[ God knows he doesn't like it any more than Deku. They're both so different, but their main goal has always been the same... ]
But right now we can do more fucking good on one side or the other than we can being thrown out of the whole circus. Or do you think we can somehow go it alone?
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I don't think that.
[His voice gets quieter. Smaller.]
I just want to help.
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[ Like what? ]
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What does that mean?
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[ Shit like that. ]
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Do you think that would have been enough?
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